Sleepabee

Choosing a bedtime

5 min read

When babies and toddlers usually go to bed, why a later bedtime rarely means a later morning, and how a short routine helps them settle.

Bedtime is not just a time on the clock. It is the end of your baby's last wake window of the day, and it sets up the whole night. Getting it roughly right often makes settling easier and mornings calmer.

Typical bedtimes by age

These are the bedtimes Sleepabee plans around. They follow the schedules published by baby-sleep specialists.

AgeTypical bedtime
0–2 months20:00–21:30
2–3 months19:30–21:00
from about 3–4 months to 2 years19:00–20:00

In the first three months babies often fall asleep for the night later, and that is fine. From around 3–4 months, bedtime gradually moves earlier, and by about five months most babies settle into the 19:00–20:00 range.

Bedtime follows the day

  • It comes after the last wake window. If the last nap ends late, bedtime moves later; if it ends early, bedtime comes earlier. The window before bed is usually the longest of the day.
  • A rough day means an earlier night. After a skipped or very short nap, it helps to bring bedtime forward — by up to about an hour — so your child does not go to bed overtired. Even then, Sleepabee does not plan a bedtime before 18:00.
  • The same goes for nap transitions. While a child is learning to manage with one nap fewer, an earlier bedtime for a few weeks helps make up for the missing sleep.

Later to bed rarely means later to wake

It is tempting to keep a baby up later in the hope of a lie-in. For most babies it does not work: they tend to wake at their usual time anyway, so a later bedtime simply means less sleep overall — and an overtired baby can even wake earlier.

Keep the morning steady too

A regular wake-up time anchors the whole day, including bedtime. For toddlers, a Cleveland Clinic paediatric sleep doctor suggests sleeping in no more than about an hour past the usual wake-up time at weekends, and notes that a new bedtime and wake time can take around three weeks to settle — so change times gradually and consistently.

A short, calm bedtime routine

A simple routine, done in the same order every night, signals that the day is ending.

  • Keep it short. About 20–30 minutes is plenty.
  • Choose a few calm steps. For example a bath, night clothes and a fresh nappy, a story or a lullaby, dimmed lights, and a cuddle — plus brushing teeth once they appear.
  • Feed early in the routine, not as the very last step, so your baby does not learn to need a feed to fall asleep.
  • Wind down beforehand. Lively play right before bed can make settling harder.
  • Put your baby down drowsy but awake. From around 4 months, this gives them the chance to learn to fall asleep on their own in their own bed.

When to talk to a doctor

Talk to your doctor or health visitor soon if your child:

  • snores often, seems to struggle to breathe at night, or is very sleepy during the day;
  • is not gaining weight as expected, or has lost their appetite;
  • has sleep problems you are finding hard to manage.

If you are worried and not sure what to do, it is always fine to ask.

If your baby is under 3 months old with a temperature of 38 °C (100.4 °F) or higher, or 3–6 months old with 39 °C (102.2 °F) or higher, call your doctor straight away. If you cannot reach a doctor, call your local emergency number.

Call your local emergency number now if your baby:

  • stops breathing for more than 20 seconds;
  • is breathing very fast or with great effort — grunting, or sucking their tummy in with each breath;
  • has blue, grey, pale or blotchy skin, lips or tongue;
  • is very hard to wake, or will not wake up;
  • is floppy, or is not feeding;
  • has a seizure (fit), or a rash that does not fade when you press a glass against it.

Sources

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